The relationship between beer and massage

massage is the key to life in China.  there's five hundred hair dressers on every street, for $1.50 they wash your hair and give you a head/face/back rub for 45 minutes.  but that is not enough.  Bathhouses are where it's at, a bit more expensive but it's full on.  first you strip your clothes and are thrown in this big communal shower - you need to have consumed at least 2 beers beforehand to feel comfortable.  next they give you a miniscule excuse for a hand towel which is the only thing to cover your vital organs and plomp you on this table and work you for an hour and a half.  many innovative technique are used, including some salt like substance which exfoliates your body like no other.  then you're given a robe and thrown into this room with couchs and beds, everyone is chilling watching TV.  at this point one of two things have happened.   1, women come up to you aggressively and offer to give you the "big airplane", otherwise known as the great ride., usually combined with suggestive hand gestures.  2, bunch of interested blokes come up and talk to you, and the only english word the know is 'gay'.  that's right, at that point we usually leave.  the funny thing is that my buddy Nick, who just so happens to be Buddhist, and very down to earth and righteous lad, is most often the main instigator of our late night massage pursuits.

leaving today with my buddies to go to this coastal city where the country's largest brewery is.  they're having a 'beer fest' this weekend, all tickets by train are sold out but this afternoon we'll go to the train station and figure it out.